Like Cheralynn, most parents think they "should" stop yelling or shouting, but they don`t believe there`s another way to get their child`s attention. After all, it`s our job to teach them, and how else can we get them to listen? It’s not like yelling hurts them; they barely listen, they roll their eyes. Of course they know we love them, even if we yell. Right?
Wrong. The truth is that yelling scares kids. It makes them harden their hearts to us. And when we yell, kids go into fight, flight or freeze, so they stop learning whatever we`re trying to teach. What`s more, when we yell, it trains kids not to listen to us until we raise our voice. And it teaches them to yell back.
If your child doesn`t seem afraid of your anger, it’s an indication that he`s seen too much of it and has developed defenses against it -- and against you. The unfortunate result is a child who is less likely to want to behave.
Whether or not they show it, our anger pushes kids of all ages away from us. Yelling at them practically guarantees that they’ll have an “attitude” by the time they’re ten, and that yelling fights will be the norm during their teen years. And as kids harden their hearts to us, they look for more from their peer group. We lose our influence with them just when we need it most....more
Kathleen Notes: Yup...when you yell your message is lost...
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- - Volume: 11 - WEEK: 1 Date: 1/5/2023 2:23:07 PM -